Last week I found myself preparing for a special workshop that my organization only holds every few years. Three years ago I found myself preparing for the same workshop when just days before I detected a lump in my breast. Of course it took months and several tests and procedures before I finally heard the words, “You have cancer.” But instead of being in that place, I find myself with the strength and energy to handle what feels like an even more demanding schedule.
Honestly I believe it has taken me two years to shake the effects of cancer and its treatment and adjust to a new reality in my life. The most difficult part has not been how I feel personally, but how I internalize and feel about the people I have come to truly care for who are experiencing much greater struggles with cancer and recurrences. My heart aches for them. I can feel their fear. I know what goes through their mind. There is nothing I can do to help them or make it better for them or take away their fear. And I can’t do anything to take away my own fear. Somehow, or rather by the grace of God, I move forward each day trying to grab as much life as I can.
Each day I am grateful for my health and the blessings in my life. And each day I also remember others who continue to fight. I am asking that you do the same. I need all your good thoughts, healing energy, prayers, mojo, or whatever you call it to be directed at Lori and her husband Cary. Lori is an amazingly strong warrior who needs strength from everywhere she can get it to keep fighting. If you are reading this, Lori, I am dedicating my Relay laps to you. I’ll be there 24 hours and I’ll be carrying you with me in spirit.
Never take a day or any moment of any day for granted. Let’s all grab as much life as we can today.
Labels: moving on after cancer