Friday, April 08, 2005
You're Gonna Make it After All
"Your energy affects others so choose to be a beacon of light. Project goodness, happiness, and peace outward through your home, neighborhood, country, and, finally the world. The effects are felt for thousands of miles."

My sister, Joyce, sent this to me today. It was part of an article titled, "Steps in the Right Direction: 8 Steps to Make a Difference in the World." After reading this I realized something important.

I've been keeping my light under my hat so to speak. Today is the day that ends.

A few days ago I posted my mini-poll regarding how to wear my post-chemo hair. The results were pretty even with the vast majority voting to "spike it out and be free" and "enjoy the freedom -- it's only hair." I loved all the comments I received and I loved that more than 40 people even cared to vote. One comment I received went straight from the screen to my heart. Greg wrote, "Enjoy whichever way suits you best, as the re-affirmation of your life, your body's will to survive."

Early on in my journey I wrote about the physical challenges that come with breast cancer and its treatment. I felt as though I was being stripped of everything feminine, beginning with my hair. Physically, I have been stripped of many things. For a time I cried silently as I watched what seemed to be parts of me dying from the treatment. Slowly finding that edge of life and clinging on in the hope that the cancer was being killed off too.

Just as slowly my rebirth began without my realization of what was happening. My energy returned first. Next came the eyebrows and eye lashes. Slowly my finger nails strengthened and began to grow. A dark crown of gentle curls emerged shyly. It was as if an artist was repainting me bit by bit. Somehow this growth has been a sign of life or, as Greg put it so elequently, "a re-affirmation of life." My body does have a will to survive and I want the world to know. It is time to stop hiding behind the hat for it was a sign of the cancer and my hair regrowth is a sign of new life. The artist is far from done, but the picture is filling in and coming into focus.

Cue the music.
Cue Actress: Hat toss; exhuberant smile.
Freeze frame.
End credits.
That's a rap.

Written by Jeannette Vagnozzi
5 chimed in

Name: Jeannette
Location: Southern California, USA

This is my story about being diagnosed with breast cancer at age 39. I thought I was out of the woods, but four years late it came back. This is my quest to be a two-time survivor.

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